Why Nice Guys Finish Last...

(Found this on the web, thought it was relevant, thought I'd share..)

Why Nice Guys Finish Last :

Are you a nice guy who has always wondered why the cocky guy -- the one who barely appears interested in the girl -- is usually the one who gets the girl?

Have you suffered from hearing the words, "You're a really nice guy, but I only like you as a friend," from a woman who you would do (or may, in fact, have already done) just about anything and everything for -- only to turn around and watch her date (or even chase) a guy who treats her like she's nothing special?

And are you stumped wondering why she would date a guy who treats her like that when she could have you who would treat her like a princess and give her everything she wants?

Well, you better brace yourself because I'm going to tell you a couple of secrets that you might not want to hear.

First, "nice" equates with boring and predictable. Look up "nice" in the dictionary and you'll find: pleasant; agreeable; satisfactory. In other words, average -- not exceptional, not exciting, and not sexy.

I'll bet you've never heard a woman say she didn't want to date a guy because he was too confident, too passionate, or too exciting -- have you?

But, I'll bet you have heard women say things like, "He's such a nice guy. He's so sweet and he's always there for me, but I only like him as a friend." Or, "He's such a good guy -- kind, thoughtful, generous, honest, loyal -- but there's no chemistry.

"He just doesn't turn me on." Sadly, I hear it all the time. The fact is, Mr. Nice Guy, you cannot bore a woman into feeling attracted to you or into wanting to date you. And as obvious as that sounds, if you are one of those guys I described that is exactly what you are trying to do. And it won't work.

Please understand that I am not suggesting that you mistreat women or disrespect them in any way.

What I suggesting is that you value and respect yourself more.

To illustrate what I mean:

The answer to the question,

"Why does the guy who doesn't appear to care as much about the girl get the girl?" is simple:

The nice guy cares too much, too soon.

He has made the woman too important and too valuable and it shows in everything he says and does.

He is too available, too eager to please, too accommodating, and he gives too much -- all without getting anything in return.

By doing so, he has made himself appear desperate, insecure, needy of this woman's attention, affection, and approval -- and he has stripped himself of any value in her eyes. After all, if he's already doing and giving everything, without her doing or giving anything - why would she value him? She won't. She is not going to value him any more than he values himself. What she is going to do is look for someone else, someone who she perceives as being more worthy, more confident, and more valuable.

It works like this:

Once you need something, or you want it too badly, you forfeit your strength and lose all power of negotiation.

You are in a position of weakness and you are perceived as weak. Someone (or something) else is in control of you, the situation, and it's outcome. Men in this situation appear to be anything but confident, strong, and exciting. More, they are perceived as being unworthy and as lacking value.

Translation:

Things that are easily acquired, obtained, or maintained, without any effort or sacrifice, lack value... it's human nature.

The secret to why the cocky guy wins with women, over the nice guy, is that he is perceived as being a stronger, more confident guy with more value.

How?

He never invests everything -- his entire being, ego, and self-worth in what one woman's response or reaction to him is.

He doesn't gush with compliments; he isn't always available; he doesn't give too much; and he knows he isn't going to die if a woman says "no" to him.

More, his attitude is, yeah, I'd like to go out with you, but if I can't, that's OK -- I'm a busy guy, with exciting things going on, and lots of other options.

(Your thoughts..)

Supra Black and Suede Croc

Alright so, I like designer sneakers and shit…. No, not uptowns with the Gucci print. But actual name brands, creative recreations, Ato Matsumoto’s, Supra’s.. sneakers like that.. I just picked up a pair of Supra’s from their fall catalog and these joints are sick! I thought maybe some of you might appreciate them. These are their black and suede Crocs.

Munchies !!!!

Munchies !! MMMM HHMMM!!! Delicious! You see, this is the reason why a dude gotta stay in the gym a couple times a week!!

The Matrix (written 11/21/2008)

Sometimes, I feel like I'm Neo, and I'm in the Matrix. I have already taken the red pill (or whatever color pill he took to realize "the truth"), and I am walking around my neighborhood seeing everything and everyone in "code" or seeing them for what they really are. they dont know that they are being controlled by a superior being and they are living, breathing, and behaving like robots. I take that back, not as robots, but like animals in some instances. Now, I'm not in any way suggesting I am better than anyone because I strongly believe that everyone has their strengths and weaknesses in any area. But, I do believe that ignorance is a deadly deadly virus that can keep you sick and uninformed. It can lock down your brain from receiving any signals of knowledge. It can keep you locked in a particular social class for decades upon decades... The other day while I walked to my car I saw a kid I grew up with. He asked where I worked and I told him that I worked at all the hospitals on Manhattan. He replied "Manhattan? aint that where all the gays are at?"... In my mind I kind of felt sorry for him and his question, but I decided not to laugh or show any type of reaction that'll suggest I was ridiculing him. I said "well there's a specific part that is known to have a large homosexual population, but thats not the whole island"... sigh...



I felt like I've always been "the one". When I was four years old I read books that were at the ninth grade reading level (I used to be smart, Don't really know what happened over time).. I've always had the need to try to know a little bit about everything. But, I guess that's just me. Of course there are agents out there, who's main job is to stop me from rising up and being successful. They transform from looking like regular non suspecting humans to reveal their true form when ever they try to destroy me. There was an incident when I was arguing with my next door neighbors because they were parked in front of my driveway as I waited 40 minutes for them to come outside to move it. Then gave me attitude because they had to move it! Long story short, after a brief flurry of explicatives had been exchanged between us I'll never forget one of their closing attacks..... get ready for this one.. you guys ready? She goes.."you white boy, going to work everyday with your shirt and tie on!"...

I'm sorry but she left herself open... so open I had to stoop down to her level and deliver pae mae's five point punch of death to destroy her (I know, I know, he doesn't teach it to everyone just his very best students). I said some very hurtful things, honestly, I almost felt kind of bad afterwards.....almost.

Of course there are others out there that are enlightened as well. My peeps that fight the secret war against ignorance. And gladly join me in the fight to enlight more soldiers. Offer them a choice between pills. This is the pack I try to stay associated with. People who I can learn from and stimulate thought with. BUT, there are those soldiers who hate the fact that they are enlightened and wish to go back to the simplistic life before they knew what was really going on. They do not want the burden of knowing that the steak they are eating doesn't really taste like steak, but in fact their mind is programed to tell them what a steak tastes like. What if that steak really tastes like corned beef? There are those soldiers that don't want to know the truth, and would rather just eat a delicious ass steak while saying to themselves "ignorance is bliss!".. I have to be careful and be able to realize when I'm dealing with one of these foes, they work with agents very closely..

Now that Barack is Morpheus there may be some hope for change. slowly but surely more of us will continue to destroy these agents, and kill the machines sent out to destroy us by keeping us ignorant. We'll destroy them with our knowledge. I personally like to carry several weapons of knowledge just in case of a sneak attack of ignoranc. Bullets of thought, and laser beams of inspiration. Grenades and mines ready to explode motivation, perserverance, and ingenuity...

-Neo

Conversations with a Jewish Man on Christmas Eve

I had a very interesting interaction with an older Orthodox jewish gentleman, while at work on christmas eve. He was part of the staff who cleaned up the Operating Rooms after a surgery has occured (guess you can call him a janitor). I was in the O.R. waiting for a case to start when the head nurse called for him to go clean a room. One of his co-workers jokingly said "hey come on leave him alone, it's christmas eve.. he shouldn't be working". A doctor was walking past and replied " who ? Rosenblum... he doesn't have to work either, hey man, when are you going to sell me one of your buildings?"

The doctor continued to give him accolades on being able to own multiple residential properties while I eavesdropped.. and when the doctor walked away and left him in the room alone to clean up, I decided I would approach him, introduce myself, then ask him if I could pick his brain in order to get some helpful hints on how to get on the road to being a successful property owner.

He was very down to earth, and was really open and honest. I asked him how'd he get started and he told me he saved his money for about 3 years and bought his first property from one of his cousins. He made careful decisions when it came to lawyers, banks, and the loans he took out.

Out of nowhere he says to me (in an orthodox jewish accent) " you know what the problem is with you people?... you like to buy too much garbage, you see, we don't do that.. we don't care about basketball shoes or cars, the only thing we care about is our property, it is the fastest way to become wealthy"..

I wasn't offended by the "you people" comment, mainly because I felt like he was being genuine and speaking to me with wisdom.. and actually WANTED to pass on some words of wisdom..

He continued "my friend, I promise you.. all you have to do for me is save your money for atleast 2 years, thats it, and I guarantee you.. you can get into a property"

He continued and we spoke about other little details pertaining to real estate, being a landlord, renting, so on and so forth.

In the end, I realized I met a man who was a multimillionaire... who owned a couple multi family properties but was still humble enough to go to work as a janitor everyday!..

When I finished college one of the things I promised I would accomplish as early as possible, would be to buy a house or maybe two. Mainly because it is the fastest way to wealth and homes are an excellent investment. One of my "resolutions" is to make that goal one of my main focuses for 2009!

Why Are You Really Upset....

Come on, now answer this question as honestly as possible. Why are you really upset? Is it really because you know it wouldn't be able to work?

Or, is it because she doesn't want YOU anymore?

(and YOU, as in who you are, who you've become on the inside/ what you appear to be on the outside doesn't matter)

Is it because you wanted her to be the love of your life, and through all the turmoil, in the end you would only destroy each other, rather than build each other up?

(Destroy each other like mortal enemies, destroying each other internally.. spiritually tearing each others souls apart)...

Or, is it because she's no longer there to stroke your ego.. to comfort you .. there on call, ready willing and able to comfort you whenever your dealing with any mental duress....?

(support me babe, I'm calling you to hear me out)

Why are you really upset? Be honest.

Late at night, what's bothering you?.. The fact that no one is there to speak to you on the level of consciousness only two cosmic beings can relate to?

Or, the fact that she doesn't WANT TO anymore.. You must love rejection, no? So why are you really upset then?

I know why you're upset. love brings change. You've been changed. You have to change back to how you were before. Before you were softened up.. Your too sweet, like that rock candy. Sure you'll get sucked on, but after a while its annoying, and you have to get spat out.

No but seriously, and I'll ask one more time... why are you really upset?..


Why?

Why?

Oh, I know why?


It's alright, cope .. the feelings are natural. the feelings of "want", and "need"... take them in. Use them to help make you stronger. Reflect, relax and reflect. Use them to build the impenetrable force that is ultimately you. Unbreakable.. thats what you are.. Learn. Add more knowledge.

Well, now you know.. and its fuel now, so use it to drive you beyond measure..

Beyond measure.

Sex

Biggie said:

"sex wit the ex makes the sex spec-tacular..." or something to that effect. But, what has always made sex with your ex so alluring? Well maybe not for all people, but I always tend to hear about sticky situations dealing with women, their ex boyfriends, and new lovers.

Is it the familiar touch? A certain warmth... a closeness... he knows what you want and how you want it, and vice-versa?

While I was at work, in a public area, I heard a girl make a comment... she said : "I would rather have sex with one of my ex's when I'm single, rather than find some new guy to do the job and add another motherfucker to my list of mutherfuckers that boned me already"...

I had to crack up right there on the spot. But I guess she kind of had a point....

For me, in the past sex with the ex always created some type of confusion.. and in the end we both would argue and bitch and moan and revisit why we couldnt be together..

Your thoughts...

To Artina

To Artina:



I will take your heart

I will take your soul out of your body

As though I were God.

I will not be satisfied

With the little words you say to me.

I will not be satisfied

With the touch of your hand

Nor the sweet of your lips alone.

I will take your heart for mine.

I will take your soul.

I will be God when it comes to you.

-Langston Hughes


(Whats your interpretation of this poem?)

When Refs Attack!!!

I grew up playing football. Played since I was a little kid all the way up to college. I had dreams of playing in the NFL, but.. I wasn't quick enough. Strong enough, but didn't have the quickness to be a professional. With that said, I have to admit that there was a part of the game I definitely took for granted, the referrees.. or officials if you prefer that term. Sometimes they worked in our favor, and sometimes we just looked at them like they were complete nuisances. They were always in the way of a play, or arguing with our coaches. There are teammates I can argue with about certain calls that were made on my team, that may even have cost us certain games in high school and college!!

It was not until I stopped playing and really had the time to become a spectator that I realized the amount of hard work these dudes put in during a full game. They have specific positions, along with certain fouls or infractions EACH Ref may be assigned to! Nope, all these years of playing and I never knew that the Ref that stood right behind the defense (usually right next to the linebackers) were actually called Field Judges!! ( I know I know, I should be embarrassed)

Question: Have you ever seen a Running Back Break away for a really long run, and while that's happening.. while the announcer is screaming "he's at the thirty, he's at the twenty, he's at the ten.... five, TOUCHDOWN!!!" actually LOOK AT THE SIDELINE NEXT TO THE RUNNING BACK?!?!? YES a referee will be right there RUNNING FULL SPEED RIGHT NEXT TO HIM!!.. I never witnessed this until a couple years ago, and secretly whenever a back breaks a run, I always look for the ref sprinting down the field doing his job, looking at him to make sure he's in bounds, etc..

The truth of the matter is about 90% of these guys used to play organized football to a certain degree. And if they are working in the NFL, its more than likely they used to actually play IN the NFL. Most of them are still in shape too. They have full blown work out regiments and everything !! Nonetheless there are still players who take referees for granted, and I remember back in my playing days they used to say "if a ref gets in your way, run him over".. well on the professional level it may be a little bit different. You might actually run into a guy that might've played a little ball... and he might even still have that "Mean Streak" where you automatically put your shoulder into a guy "just because you had the opportunity"...

So, to have made a short story long, Referee Garth DeFelice ANNIHILATED Rams running back Kenneth Darby yesterday during the Rams game!! Google it to find the actual video, I know its on there by now!..

You have this Preconditioned mind set.

(written sometime in the year 2005)

You See, you have this preconditioned mindset.

Almost like its a challenge.. this .... this... man, woman thing.. This.. I like you, let me see if you like me, and hopefully you do..... thing..

this ...this... if you do, then maybe we could be.. something beautiful .... thing..

But thats the thing.. You're afraid.. afraid of this thing that can chase all your demons away. It may be too powerful for you.

It may be too powerful for me, but ,maybe we should give into this thing we fear most. Let go of all our insecurities. Let go of the steering wheel and see what happens.

I would like to be able to live life like I only have 2 weeks to live, really live and not sweat the petty things.. never look back, love unconditionally and laugh incontrollably... sigh... that would be bliss..

You see, you have this preconditioned mindset. as if you're suppossed to be miserable, as if you're suppossed to be mistreated. No!.. open your eyes and know that you are a queen.. Come here, let me hold you.. caress you, .. kiss you... play with your hair.. massage you..

Doesnt it feel good?. I want to make you feel good. All the time.. because you're special.. I would like to change your mindset. That preconditioned madness..

I want to love you..

Snow Flakes; written 12/16/08

Today as I left a hospital in Manhattan it started to snow. I've always liked the snow. Growing up, I always associated it with this time of the year. Christmas and the end of the year. Every once in a while I stop to take in the beauty of things and as I stood on the corner of 17th street and 1st avenue I realized that the flakes gradually became larger and larger. Each snow flake was exaggerated in its beauty. Some of them seemed filled with sadness and as they floated slowly to the ground they weeped. They did not fall abrubtly to the ground without any regard... As if a higher power wanted to place them gently onto the earth. And I noticed each snowflake stuck to the ground and did not melt... When I started to walk to my car I noticed the snowfall began to get more and more violent. Each flake wasn't as exaggerated, and I wasn't able to make them out. They were small microchips of confusion. When they hit they ground it was almost as if each one died.. They did not care anymore and wanted to be thrown to their demise, and as they hit the ground,

each.....One......Dissappeared......